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Clog Updates

// August 27th, 2006 // Personal

Sarah sent me a text saying that she’s been reading my clog, and it looked like I was having fun. I’m working on the assumption that her mobile phone’s predictive text feature needs to be brought up to the 21st century – but it’s nice to know I have a ‘readership’.

In return, here’s what I’ve learnt so far:

1. Like the song says, ‘Wear Sunscreen’ – too many close calls for comfort.
2. Local things are cheap. Anything that would attract a westener is expensive.
3. Always take your cap with you – always. You look stupid wearing it but it helps (see point 1).
4. Your colleagues will laugh less if you only refer to it as ‘my stupid cap’.
5. Because of the heat, things that shouldn’t be, are runny: Here are some of the more disturbing things..
• Toliet Duck
• Ketchup
• Toothpaste
• Butter
• Road markings
6. Talking of which, Road markings are purely decorative – if the road is phyically capable of having 6 cars abreast then you should go for 7. That’s what the hard shoulder is for.
7. As Einstein’s theories predict, time is in fact, a variable. Don’t expect anything to happen on time – that is the road to disapointment my friend.
8. When you get a phone installed in your apartment you aren’t told what the number is, which isn’t as big a problem as you would think as it won’t make international calls so is no use at all.
9. The swimming pool is better after dark as you can float on your back a look at the stars (admittedly through a layer of polution).
10. When it rains, it really rains – we’re talking flash floods, people drowning that kind of thing.
11. The time zone difference between here and the UK is really really inconvenient for calling home.

One thing that brings peace of mind though are the constants.

1. Mini-cab drivers will take every oportunity to fleece you.
2. Starbucks charges an obscene amount of money for a cop of tea.
3. Vodka in swanky bars tastes better than the stuff you have at home.
4. Heinz tomato soup is still the best type of soup money can buy.

So, yeah, in summary. Sarah is right – I am having fun.
Hugz
-A-